Confidence

The older I get the more confidence I think I should have. The reality is that I seem to question myself all the more as time goes on. Questions about life, my plans, my world view, myself.... 

So many things can make us question: why? when? where? what? how?

It can be as simple as an off-handed remark in a passing conversation or understanding a different way of life; realizing something you've never seen clearly before; a caring question or friendly chat; for the first time understanding something you've heard all your life; any kind of change.... 

The list is endless. 

Life it just full of questions that need answers and often there are more of the former than the later.  That is a confidence killer: not knowing the answer. If I dwell on what I don't know I start getting a bit panic-y. It's hard making decisions in this state and there are decisions to be made every day.

I'm not talking about the "big" decisions so much as the "small" ones. Those that shape character: the good fruits of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). When I am focusing on questions without answers my fruit is "stunted" in a way. For example, think about how hard it is to be joyful when you're worried....

This line of thought brought to mind the song Maria sings in "The Sound of Music":

"What will this day be like? I wonder.

What will my future be? I wonder.

...Oh I must stop these doubts all these worries!

If I don't I just know I'll turn back.

I must dream of the things I am seeking - 

I am seeking the courage I lack.

The courage to serve them with reliance.

Face my mistakes without defiance.

Show them I'm worthy and while I show them, I'll show me..."

The song shows that a change came when Maria stopped mulling over what she 

didn't know and began stating what she did:

"I have confidence in sunshine, 

I have confidence in rain,

I have confidence that spring will come again

Besides which you see I have confidence in me!"

Confidence means to be "self-assured, to feel or show certainty about something, secure, positive, safe."  So what is it I am confident in? 

"I am CONVINCED [to be completely certain about something] that nothing can ever separate us from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow - not even the powers of hell can separate us from GOD'S LOVE. No power in the sky above or in the earth below - indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from THE LOVE OF GOD THAT IS REVEALED IN CHRIST JESUS OUR LORD." 

(Romans 8:38-39 NLT)

The best picture of confidence I can think of is a child that runs and jumps off a platform into your arms. They didn't stop to wonder IF, HOW, WHEN, WHERE ... With complete joy they are living life, confident. 

"He is jealous for me. If love's like a hurricane, I am a tree

Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy

All of a sudden I am UNAWARE of these AFFLICTIONS

ECLIPSED BY GLORY and I realize just how beautiful You are

And how GREAT Your affections are for me

Oh How He Loves Us!

We are His portion and He is our prize 

Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes

If His grace is an ocean, we're all sinking

Then heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss

And my heart turns violently inside of my chest

AND I DON'T HAVE TIME TO MAINTAIN THESE REGRETS

WHEN I THINK ABOUT THE WAY

That He Loves ME!"

("How He Loves" by: David Crowder)

Back In The Saddle

Oops! I was doing so well with my 2013 resolution to blog more. Ah well, I do have some valid excuses: I was out of state the beginning of March and over Easter (hopefully you will read more about that soon) which was lovely but travel does make life busier! And I WAS still writing. A recent aquiantance (i.e. last summer) asked me if I would write an article (see link at bottom) for a website he manages called "The Breed's Hill Institute; Articles, News, History and Education about The Revolutionary War and America's Founding."

He said I could pick any subject from the 18th century to research and write about. And so I would like to introduce you to Miss Sybil Ludington; a 16 year old girl who many have named as "the female Paul Revere."  This is Berton Braley's clever take on Longfellow's poem:

Listen, my children, and you shall hear
Of a lovely feminine Paul Revere
Who rode an equally famous ride
Through a different part of the countryside,
Where Sybil Ludington’s name recalls
A ride as daring as that of Paul’s.

In April, Seventeen Seventy-Seven,
A smoky glow in the eastern heaven
(A fiery herald of war and slaughter)
Came to the eyes of the Colonel’s daughter.
“Danbury’s burning,” she cried aloud.
The Colonel answered, “‘T is but a cloud,
A cloud reflecting the campfires’ red,
So hush you, Sybil, and go to bed.”

“I hear the sound of the cannon drumming”
“‘T is only the wind in the treetops humming!
So go to bed, as a young lass ought,
And give the matter no further thought.”
Young Sybil sighed as she turned to go,
“Still, Danbury’s burning–that I know.”

Sound of a horseman riding hard
Clatter of hoofs in the manoryard
Feet on the steps and a knock resounding
As a fist struck wood with a mighty pounding.
The doors flung open, a voice is heard,
“Danbury’s burning–I rode with word;
Fully half of the town is gone
And the British–the British are coming on.
Send a messenger, get our men!”
His message finished the horseman then
Staggered wearily to a chair
And fell exhausted in slumber there.

The Colonel muttered, “And who, my friend,
Is the messenger I can send?
Your strength is spent and you cannot ride
And, then, you know not the countryside;
I cannot go for my duty’s clear;
When my men come in they must find me here;
There’s devil a man on the place tonight
To warn my troopers to come–and fight.
Then, who is my messenger to be?”
Said Sybil Ludington, “You have me.”

“You!” said the Colonel, and grimly smiled,
“You!” My daughter, you’re just a child!”
“Child!” cried Sybil. “Why I’m sixteen!
My mind’s alert and my senses keen,
I know where the trails and the roadways are
And I can gallop as fast and as far
As any masculine rider can.
You want a messenger? I’m your man!”

The Colonel’s heart was aglow with pride.
“: Spoke like a soldier. Ride, girl, ride
Ride like the devil; ride like sin;
Summon my slumbering troopers in.
I know when duty is to be done
That I can depend on a Ludington!”

So over the trails to the towns and farms
Sybil delivered the call to arms.
Riding swiftly without a stop
Except to rap with a riding crop
On the soldiers’ doors, with a sharp tattoo
And a high-pitched feminine halloo.
“Up! up there, soldier. You’re needed, come!
The British are marching!” and the drum
Of her horse’s feet as she rode apace
To bring more men to the meeting place.

Sybil grew weary and faint and drowsing,
Here limbs were aching, but still she rode
Until she finished her task of rousing
Each sleeping soldier from his abode,
Showing her father, by work well done,
The he could depend on a Ludington.

Dawn in the skies with its tints of pearl
And the lass who rode in a soldier’s stead
Turned home, only a tired girl
Thinking of breakfast and then of bed
With never a dream that her ride would be
A glorious legend of history;
Nor that posterity’s hand would mark
Each trail she rode through the inky dark,
Each path to figure in song and story
As a splendid, glamorous path of glory–
To prove, as long as the ages run,
That “you can depend on a Ludington.”

Such is the legend of Sybil’s ride
To summon the men from the countryside
A true tale, making her title clear
As a lovely feminine Paul Revere!

Follow the link below to read the article and learn more about this brave young lady.

http://www.breedshill.org/The_Breeds_Hill_institute/Another_Midnight_Ride.html

Ask The One Who Knows

 Words I heard on the way to work this morning (from a song off the Franz Family's "Who At My Door Is Standing" CD) coupled with pictures I found online:

  Jesus I am thankful for all You've given me
And I'm asking for Your help Lord to be all You'd have me be

  

With an humble voice I cry out from a world filled with pain
Please help me see the sunshine and look beyond the rain

I'm asking You 'cause You know how to heal a heart and clear the doubt
You can take away the hurt and make it all work out
I'm asking You 'cause You know how

 

May I always be aware of the blessings that You bring
And may You always be the reason I lift my voice and sing

    
Teach me faith and guide me and show me how to stand
Through trying times that face me Lord I know You can
 ("I'm Asking You" by: Shawn Lane)

 

This last picture is by artist Kelly O'Neill. This is what she shares about the story behind "Mine for a Moment." After losing a close friend, she "was struggling to balance loving fiercely with a willingness to let go." GOD showed her this picture in her mind, and she painted it. "...a little girl was playing in the field with her father. He had just let go of her hand, and she was running away, but smiling back at him. I knew that this image represented the attitude I was to have about the people I treasure most in my life."   (Information from another person's blog.)

Unfading Roses

Nanny, PopPop, Mom, and Me; 4 generations!

My great-grandmother, Katie Rice Syphard Shantz, was born September 17, 1918. Early this morning, Feburary 21, 2013, she passed away.  Being her first great-grandchild I realize how incredibly blessed I was to have known her so well and to have so many wonderful memories.

Nanny, Mom, and Great-PopPop (He passed away before I was born)

Just a few things that come to mind when I think of Nanny:

✥ She was my great-grandmother/babysitter/friend.

✥ She was the one who came closest to spoiling us. 

✥ She enjoyed taking us shopping and giving gifts.

✥ You had to be careful what you said you liked because she would buy it for you!

✥ I remember taking summer naps on the carpeted floor of her air conditioned appartment.

✥ My first sleep-over (all by myself, just for fun) was with her.

✥ As a little girl I was facinated by the fact that she had false teeth and would take them out at night.

✥ Her favorite color was red. 

✥ She used to tell me about a red coat she had when she was a girl.

✥ She loved seeing cardinals and butterflies.

✥ A box of crayons and coloring book would keep us entertained for hours.

✥ I blame my love of Peanut M&Ms and York Peppermint Patties on her. She always had them in the pantry.

✥ She liked taking long walks and pretty flowers

✥ She liked good eating:

homemade cookies & veggie soup/chicken nuggets/hot dogs/French fries 

✥ Ice cream was a staple:

butter pecan/peach/black cherry/whipped cream in a can and marachino cherries.

✥ She would find the biggest potato chips in the bag and give them to us.

✥ We watched TV at her house since we didn't have cable: 

Waltons/Flinstons/Jetsons/Scooby-Doo/Dr. Quinn/

Lawrence Welk Show

✥ She loved animals, especially baby animals, chicken, and geese.

✥ She made scrap books for her great-grandchildren. 

✥She would page through magazines looking for cute things to cut out.

✥ She loved babies; holding and playing with them.

✥ She thought a dog licking your face was just horrible.

✥ She taught us the saying: "Beans, beans the musical fruit…" and thought "tooting" was hilarious!

✥ She loved her family.

A picture from mom's photo album of a very young Katie Shantz

She struggled with Altzhiemers for more than a decade and it was hard knowing she didn't remember any of us. She was so loved and we will miss her so much, but I am glad that she no longer has to deal with physical ailments. It makes me happy to think that she is able to enjoy things again, that she is with Jesus, and there will never again be pain in her life.

I LOVE YOU, NANNY! ❤

She probably would have liked to hear the Cathedrals sing this song:

"I am going to a city,

Where the streets with gold are laid,

Where the tree of life is blooming,

And the roses never fade.

Here they bloom but for a season;

Soon their beauty is decayed.

I am going to a city,

Where the roses never fade."

Written by Elsie Osborn, Jack Osborn, Jim Miller

The Question Of LOVE

"The condition of the human heart is that we all pursue love." 

- Robert Messarge, Jr.

Based on what history has told us, I believe it is safe to assume that this statement is true.  What history has not done is to remove from our hearts the question: 

'What is love?' 

Is it an all consuming feeling that looks to passion and sensuality? 

Is it the short-lived drama of a high-school crush? 

Is it shown by a mother's tender care of her child? 

By a man's unique concern for his wife's happiness? 

A child climbing into a welcoming lap, resting its head on a capable shoulder, knowing she's safe?

What is love?

❦

"Is love a fancy or a feeling? No. It is immortal as immaculate Truth, 'Tis not a blossom shed as soon as youth drops from the stem of life -- for it will grow, in barren regions, where no water flows, Nor rays of promise cheats the pensive gloom... Nor will it change, though all be changed beside; Though fairest beauty be no longer fair, Though vows be false, and faith itself deny, Though sharp enjoyment be a suicide, And hope a specter in a ruin bare." 

- Hartley Coleridge

❦

This past Fall I had the priviledge of meeting the Jost family at one of their concerts (those of you who have seen their movie clips might know them by the youtube title "Jostie Flicks"). Their oldest daughter, Emily, sang a song her mother, Lisa, composed about the words we say and what they mean. The chorus was what stuck with me the most:

"When you say LOVE, you say a million things

More than flowers or diamond rings 

More than candy and valentines 

More than feelings and starry eyes 

When you say LOVE, you're saying SACRIFICE

You are WILLING TO LAY DOWN YOUR LIFE

WALK AWAY from your selfish pride 

TURN AWAY from the tempting side

When you say LOVE"  

❦

Recently one of my friends jokingly said: "love is over-rated." I told her it was romance that was "over-rated." Love (in the true sense of the word) could never be over-rated because it is boundless! Romance is a feeling. Feelings come and go. Love remains.

1 John 4:10 (New Living Translation)

"This is real love—not that we loved God, 

but that he loved us and sent his Son 

as a sacrifice to take away our sins."

There you have it!  Fini. Period. Take that to the bank and cash it! That's love.

(Note: These pictures were taken off the internet. I cannot claim them as my own)

My Heart Is Filled...

My heart is FILLED with thankfulness
To Him who bore MY PAIN;
Who plumbed the depths of MY DISGRACE
And gave me LIFE again;
Who CRUSHED my CURSE of sinfulness
And CLOTHED me in His LIGHT
And wrote His law of RIGHTEOUSNESS
With POW'R upon my heart.

My heart is filled with THANKFULNESS
To Him who WALKS beside;
Who floods my WEAKNESSES with STRENGTH
And causes FEARS to FLY;
Whose ev'ry promise is ENOUGH
For EV'RY step I take,
Sustaining me with ARMS OF LOVE
And crowning me with GRACE.

My HEART is filled with thankfulness
To HIM WHO REIGNS above,
Whose wisdom is my PERFECT PEACE,
Whose ev'ry thought is LOVE.
For EV'RY DAY I have on earth
Is GIVEN by the King;
So I will GIVE my life, my ALL,
To LOVE AND FOLLOW Him.

"My Heart Is Filled with Thankfulness"
Words and Music by Keith Getty & Stuart Townend
Copyright © 2003 Thankyou Music


"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the PEACE of God, which SURPASSES ALL understanding, will GUARD YOUR HEARTS AND MINDS through Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

An Unusual Art Medium and A Freeing Reality

(Subtitle: Stacking fire wood, making God your life coach, and sticking with your first love.)

So based on the title of this post you're probably thinking "what???" and your worried I'm going to lose you before we even begin. Don't worry that's as close to being philosophical as I'm going to get.

Due to several of my siblings being sick, I got to help with the OUTSIDE chores yesterday! This is always exciting as I am usually IN the house. On a farm, K.P. duty and keeping house are just as important as working in the garden, fields, and/or barn but it is nice to not be exclusively inside. I have decided to assign myself to at least one barn chore so I don't have to wait till everyone is sick to enjoy working outside!! 

This is where the "art" comes in. As I was neatly stacking firewood by the back door, I noticed the beauty of the wood grain and how the circles of wood contrasted with the lines from the brick wall behind it. Some of you may think that's silly but hey what else do you think about when you're stacking wood? Plus it's art; I mean sometimes I think if you give it an artistic name (i.e. A Study In Circles and Right Angles) that's the only thing creative about it!  So, enjoy the picture and then go take a walk or do something outside (even if it's cold). You might be surprised how much you enjoy it.

Now for the "freeing reality" part. Recently, through Bible study and teaching, the Lord has shown me that I am most free when I relinquish control of my life and place it in His hands. Talking with several friends, I was intrigued by the term "life coach." So I did a little google studying and came up with this definition from thefreedictionary.com: 

"a person whose job is to improve the quality of 

his or her client's life, by offering advice on 

professional and personal matters, such as 

career, health, personal relationships, etc."

I have always heard how important it is to carefully chose those whom you allow to influence you and whose advice you seek.  So I asked myself, "Who is my 'life coach'?" I have been blessed to have many godly advisors in my life but I came to the conclusion that the only one I want in the position of head advisor "who helps people with problems, decisions, and goal attainment in daily life" is God. He is my heavenly Father, whose Son died for my sins in pursuit of a relationship with me and who sends His Holy Spirit to guide my steps. 

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet

And a light unto my path.

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet

And a light unto my path.

When I feel afraid,

And think I've lost my way.

Still, You're there right beside me.

Nothing will I fear

As long as You are near;

Please be near me to the end.

I will not forget

Your love for me and yet,

My heart forever is wandering.

Jesus be my guide,

And hold me to Your side,

And I will love you to the end.

(song written by Amy Grant based on the truth found in Psalm 119:105)

 Christ is and always will be my first love. He is teaching me to trust Him wholly. 

With my:

Time = past, present, future, time management

 Needs = job/income, where to live, health 

 Relationships = honoring parents, loving siblings, extending forgiveness, serving in humility

Talents =  He gives abilities and the opportunities/wisdom to use them

Desires = He gives passions and goals coupled with patience and endurance

Wisdom = knowing when, how, what, where… 

To tie it all together: with the Holy Spirit as my "life coach" and Jesus as my unfailing Love, I will serve my Creator God bringing attention to His beautiful world all around us.